Top model train-set Naomi Campbell-Soup has told the Special Court for Ford Sierra that she thought former Liberian president Charles Taylor was former Hollywood actress Elizabeth Taylor.

Elizabeth Taylor

Charles Taylor

Here is Naomi’s testimony in full:

“I had never heard of Africa. I only went on that train because my assistant told me there would be a chance to meet Lord Nelson of Mandela.

“At the dinner the night before, I had been sitting next to a person called Taylor who offered me some diamonds.

“I thought that person was Elizabeth Taylor, who has got too many if you ask me.

“Only later did I find out it was Prince Charles of Taylor and he wanted to get his leg over. Now bring me some champagne.”

Naomi Campbell-Soup was raised in Streatham but not very well.

We will keep you misinformed on the latest fashions in Ford Sierra.